Murphy excited to lead house Republicans in new era of graft and corruption

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AUSTIN — During their caucus meeting Saturday, Texas house Republicans selected Jim Murphy to be their new caucus chair.

Murphy, a state representative from the Houston area, is best known for a 2018 corruption scandal when a local TV station discovered he was collecting $56,000 per month running an obscure local government entity while chairing their legislative oversight committee.

“This an exciting new era,” Murphy said. “I’m honored to have been selected by colleagues to do what I do best. This will be the Republican caucus’ most profitable session ever.”

The Texas Association of Business praised Murphy as “our kind of Republican.”

Murphy, Teacher Retirement System, to trade Best Practices for Ripping Off Taxpayers

DOWNTOWN AUSTIN — Following revelations the Teacher Retirement System of Texas signed a lease for luxury office space at $326,000 per month, Chairman Jim Murphy vowed swift action.

“This is unprecedented,” Murphy said, “we have to learn more.”

Murphy, who in 2018 was discovered to have a secret second job earning $56,000 per month at taxpayer expense, continued: “How can I get in on that?!?”

Representatives Jeff Leach, Matt Krause, and Drew Springer praised Murphy for his courage.